MUSING #6 : Word Choices - SHOULD

MUSE: I was becoming anxious after a productive morning of writing, emails, and making donations. I realized I hadn’t eaten yet. I thought to myself “ I should get something to eat” and then realized my word choice ... really I need to get something to eat and I want to do a musing on my choice to remove SHOULD from my vocabulary. 

MUSING:

Like many other Americans, I find myself saying “I should” this and “I should” that very often. The word seems harmless, but I found myself using in such a way that put another layer of expectation and/or shame unto myself. Even when considering my weekly musings it’s easy to think “I should write it now” and then feel paralyzed in pressure of doing so. So I have been considering the role of the word SHOULD and how one could be benefited by it’s removal. 

I think SHOULD has become a filler word that allows the speaker to step back from responsibility of their actions. But saying ‘I should’, I am allowing myself to hold room for the option of doing something, and the option of not doing it. And as stated above, to choose the latter option leads to feelings of guilt and shame sense SHOULD also fills the statement with a sense of requirement. Or at least awareness that the better option was to do said action. Rather than fill the statement with room to disappoint, why not use more active words, like CAN, WANT, and NEED TO. Over the last few weeks I’ve been mindful of when I use SHOULD and chose another word that stimulated more responsibility of and accountability towards the statements. I believe that led me to follow through more often, which in turn leaves a feeling of shame less often. So win-win!